She went from laughing and begging for the surprise, to quiet and concerned, the second my nerves kicked in. Obviously, it was noticeable I was about to cry. I told her the surprise was not a tangible object, but rather something I had to tell her. She perked up in the driver’s seat and began slowly shaking her head from left to right going “Oh my gosh, what’s going on? What did you do?”
I looked up and told her how much she meant to me. From there, I let those two magical words out that always seem to echo throughout my brain "I’m Gayyyyy'". After about ten seconds of her getting confirmation from several “are you reallys?”, her face lit up with the biggest smile. She pounced on me with a hug, followed by questions and everything I went through. She got pretty upset when I told her about my not-so-good days, trapped by depression.
After I released all my emotions and told my story to another person, we went right back to being our normal, goofy selves. You can always tell best friends are best friends when your stomach hurts from laughing so much at the end of the day from being together. Angel can make me laugh no matter what. She started screaming we’re "getting drunk and celebrating this". I'm down!!
Tuesday night I met up with my neighbor Jake, who lives two houses down the street. Not only was my mind spinning with anticipation to come out to him, but it was ridiculously cold out for SoFlo weather. I was nearly shaking, seconds before I brought up the subject. I have known Jake since 5th grade. He’s the athletic jock, always has a girlfriend type of guy and I was nervous to come out to him at first. Turns out, he was completely cool with me being gay.
Tonight I came out to yet another friend Rachel aka RayRay, who I met in 8th grade. We hung out together all the time, had classes together and drove home from school together Senior year. She is one of the most compassionate people I have ever met. I knew she would be cool with my sexuality, so I was really excited to come out to her. I sent her a text asking if we could meet up and walk around her neighborhood and catch up. She immediately agreed. We began walking and my nerves ran up and down my body. I got anxious but stayed calm at the same time.
After a few minutes of catching up, I came out to her. I’m starting to think homophobic people were figments of my imagination. Like all my other friends, she stopped in her tracks and spit out “What?! Are you serious?” After she knew I was serious, she threw her arms around me and I couldn’t have been happier. I felt like such a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Tonight was one of the best heart-to-hearts I've ever had. We must have walked her neighborhood 8 times, just pouring our hearts out to each other. She completely opened up to me about all the things she struggled with, past and present. I will always be there for her and I know our friendship got so much stronger after tonight.
I received this text after I left to go home: "Hey, tonight was a good night! I don’t think I’ve ever had that deep and long of a conversation with someone. I just wanted to say that I am glad to call you one of my best friends. I will always be there for you and I am glad that you wanted and did tell me everything. Can’t wait to party with you so we can have some more happy memories to add to our friendship. More un-sober memories too! Lol. Thank you for being my friend. I will never forget this night too–Rachel"
I have now come out to sixteen people! I'm so proud of myself and thankful for the people in my life.
Much love guys!