Tuesday, November 2, 2010

The Power of Self-Reflection

Its official, all my roommates are now in the loop! I came out to my third roommate this evening. I honestly couldn't have received a better reaction. He was so nice and understanding about everything.

I have now come out to a DOZEN people and I could not be more proud of myself.

I have learned several things along this journey that I want to share.
  • Coming out is not easy, but NOT coming out is 100x harder. In doing so, you're authenticating yourself and giving your soul the best gift you ever could.  
  • Things do get better, so never act upon dark impulses when you're in a negative headspace.
  • You're not alone. The pain and agony you feel is the same pain other people have felt and overcame. Be proud of the person you are and know that God loves you.
  • Crying doesn’t mean you’re weak, it means you’ve been strong for too long. I have cried more in the last four months then in my entire life combined. It's a form of healing, so embrace your emotions and just let them flow.
  • Each and everyone of us is here for a reason and you my friend, are going to do great things.

Tyler Clementi, Asher Brown, Seth Walsh, Justin Aaberg, Raymond Chase, Billy Lucas amd Cody J. Barker. These were seven individuals with a purpose and a dream. Seven individuals who ended their lives after being bullied and harassed because of their sexual identity. “There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” – Maya Angelou

It's heartbreaking that these souls felt so isolated, that they saw death as an exit from this existence on Earth. Suicide is never ever EVER the answer. Your loved ones would be haunted by the pain forever. If you feel like you're more of a burden and that the world is better off without you, you're wrong. The world needs you. We all have a life purpose here on this Earth and you'd be selling yourself short by cutting your life short.

Never be bullied into silence. Accept no one's definition of your life, but allow God to define yourself.

“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.” Revelation 21:4


  1. I absolutely love this post. I've been looking for a bible quote that I could put as a tat on my body but never could really find one that hit my heart like the one you just wrote, thanks so much. I blog myself, truthaboutabi if you wanna read my stuff. Email me sometime, it'd be cool to chat

  2. AGD: Your strength gives us renewed hope that things truly can get better, because your example of the last few months serves as a beacon to all those out there who suffer quietly in despair. I hope someone. perhaps your siblings, will relay to your parents how proud they should be that they raised such a courageous son, who has taught so many others not to be afraid.

  3. I enjoy coming out stories as I have been there, done that, and it is uaually less painful and more of a release and relief than was imagined before. So your story has prompted me to put a new column on my side blog headed Coming Out Stories and I will continue to add more that I find. I do believe the experiences of others will help more guys like you find your feet. Congrats on taking the steps.