I began reading my Bible and I've stuck to it for the last week. I also read a daily devotional guide called The Upper Room every time I walk to class (unless I’m walking with friends). I joined a Life Group, which I go to on Wednesdays. It’s a group of ten other guys and we talk about the Bible and everyday life. One of my pledge brothers signed up with me.
I'm sure you're wondering if I still attend the Tuesday night church groups, after the pastor incident. Well, I've gone back once and that's only because I've become really close friends with a handful of people there and I love being around them. However, I'm going to stop attending altogether soon, I just don't have the courage to tell them yet.
Ohh and I also came out to my friend Michelle Friday night! It was so cool! She didn’t care at all. We talked about it for about 15 minutes and then just hung out for a couple hours afterwards, like nothing happened. She left me a text message that really touched me. I got emotional from it and I thought it was beautifully written…
"If you ever need anything to talk about I am always here for you. Honestly, don't feel like you are ever alone. When you look at a person remember that everyone has a story and secrets. Everyone has gone through something that has changed them. Be happy with who you are and fuck the rest who judge you. People are always going to judge you for one reason or another but they do not matter. Our differences from one another make us beautiful."
Saturday night I went to a frat party with one of my best friends, Anita, who I've known since 7th grade!! She transferred to my school about a month ago! AH As I pulled up to her apartment after the party, I asked her if we could talk. I had come out to her earlier in the semester, but I never had the chance to really open up to her about it. We talked for like an hour and I just spilled my emotions. I told her all the things I went through while we were in high school and what it’s like growing up gay. It was one of the best conversations I have ever had in my life. I love that girl!
Senior year of High School with my main squeeze
Lastly, about an hour ago, I came out to my roommate Ryan! He wouldn’t believe me at first, but was super supportive of it. Haha To my delight, coming out is getting so much easier.
I am still going to counseling on Fridays and I love it. I will go into depth about that in a future post.
Shout out to all my Bloggy followers for being such an amazing support system! Much Love Guys!
thats awesome man!! congrats on another person told!! and keep on that pursuit of happiness like cudi :)
ReplyDeleteAmazing Gay Dude: Well, the good stories continue for you, that's great! So much of life is what we make of it - the things we can change for the better, we strive for and take those needed actions; the things we can't change, we make the best of what we have and adapt our attitudes to fit. As your self awareness grows, so will your confidence with yourself - and it shows in this post. Notice how once you were reluctant to talk about yourself being gay, that the shame of it has fallen away to a new found respect for yourself. You have so much love in your spirit just waiting to spring forth, and you'll receive love in return. I'll say it again, it's just amazing how far you've come in such a short time.
ReplyDeleteDo you have contact info somewhere on here? I wanted to ask you something, but I'd rather email it...but it only matters if you go to Jacksonville University...do you?
ReplyDeleteI do have contact info, its Bdgatorfan@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteDont hesitate to email me